The One on Rating

On the scale of 0 to 10, 0 being a total put off and 10 being an object of worship, how would you rate Sotongball in terms of him in bed?

Yes, similar question had been posted to me during the potluck on Sunday and of course I would not answer the question in front of everyone especially when the person is around too! So in the end I had to do the alternative forfeit which is to gobble down two curry puffs.

It is rude, utterly RUUUUUDE to rate someone. Because to each his own, one can be a 10 in someone's scale and a 0 in another's. It all boils down to the evaluator's taste and preference (and fetish perhaps). To make life more interesting, even someone's taste and preference can change over time as he grows more experienced, accepting, wise, self-aware or even desperate.

Ok morality aside, sometimes we just want to know how Sotongball rates his beaus (kaypoh!).

So I've came out with a template that you can follow too, let you guys rate yourself lah:

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First impression
Physically, is he my "type"? +2

If he is my type and I am his, does he play hard to get? +1 if no

During the sex, does he...
Have a clean minty breath whether or not he smokes? +1 if yes

Know how to use less teeth and more tongue? +1 if yes

Flexi? +1

Moan manly at the appropriate time? +1

Have cheesy hotdog? +1 if no

Have backsides that give skid marks? +0.5 if no, +1 if no and hairless

Have a gold mine? +0.5 if no

Know Sotongball's 2-flexis-who-top-who-btm rule? +2 if yes

Bite my titties? -1 if yes

Tickle me at the wrong time? -1 if yes

Have BO and do not know how to mask it? -1 if yes

Only expect me to "service" him and just lie there like dead fish? -2 if yes

Say he's flexi AND he's scared of pain so don't do anal or that sort of excuses? -1 if yes

Even suggest to do it raw? -2 if yes

After I came, does he...

Cum quickly shortly after? +1 if yes

Want me to jerk him off and take his own sweet time to cum? -2 if yes

Ask me whether want to swallow his cum? -1 if yes

Ask me to swallow or lick my own cum? -10 for "swallow" or -5 for "lick"

After the session, does he...

Give me a really good, satisfying and not too long smooch and say "I enjoyed it" +1 if yes

Just disappear into the shower? -1 if yes

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Score capped at 10, there you go, now you see how can some people get a zero from STB. But that does not mean that STB hate you, it just meant that you're not his type and stop trying to hit on him. Well, you'll be surprised how some of STB's zeroes turn to out to be more close to him than STB's 10s.